So Bad It Hurts
by Ash Ninja
Summary: You know when you want someone so bad it hurts? M'gann knows that feeling. She knows it so well. M'gann thoughts on Superboy. Supermartian. Second chapter up. Officially complete.
1. M'gann

**A/N: M'gann's thoughts on our dear clone.**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing! ... But I wish I did.  
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**So Bad It Hurts**

_Just want him so bad it hurts, you know? Hurts to think about, but I can't do anything except think about it._

_About those lips of his, and how they look all soft and so good for kissing. And that hair, looks like it would be super nice to run my fingers through. And those sky blue eyes of his... I hold them with my own long as he'll let me... Or until my blush is completely obvious.  
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_Sometimes it just makes me all happy, like when I'm teaching him something new about Earth, or when he make an accomplishment and he gets that lopsided kinda smile that makes my heart wanna burst, it's so adorable__._

_Then other times, like now, when I'm alone in my room and wishing he was here, or that the door would open and it'd be him coming from the living room to tell me he loves me much as I love him; those times it hurts like a big black hole in my chest. I ache all over, wishing I had never came aboard to Earth._

_I don't really mean it, of course. Next time I see his face I'll be glad all over again just that he's even here._

_Makes me light up, he does. Just the sight of him makes me wanna smile... Except for the days it makes me wanna cry._

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**A/N: I decided to get into M'gann's head. Her thoughts on Superboy, how she feels for him and deals with these feelings. It;s sad but true.**

**Also, this was like a 'all of a sudden' thing I thought of. But I hope you guys liked it. Let me know if I did a good job on channeling M'gann's thoughts. I hope I captured her voice well. **

**Reviews are greatly appreciated.  
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	2. Superboy

**A/N: And by your requests, here's Superboy's thoughts.  
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**Disclaimer: I own nothing!  
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**Insufferable Touch  
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_There is that awful need to touch someone, to be touched. For some of us it won't die. And eventually it will take you to your breaking point._

_ Frankenstein's monster, the poor bastard, couldn't stop reaching out. Like I do to Superman, my supposed Kryptonian father, no matter how much I reach out... Superman keeps avoiding me. I wish I was different. _

_Maybe like Dracula, he drank, he killed, and he had it easy. He wasn't interested in being friends. I'm not sure if I am either._

_But despite the dark parallels and similes I can draw with those monsters, somehow I have friends. A team, a family, I have brothers, Kaldur and Robin. I have annoying yet comical cousins, Wally and Artemis. But most of all I have a girl that loves me for who I am._

_M'gann._

_She's sees through my pain, my suffering in silence from the neglect I feel. With just her bright smiles that matched the sun's rays and always caring attitude, M'gann makes me feel better, lighter. Good. Like there was nothing wrong with me._

_It doesn't matter to her if I was created for a destructive purpose, violence or somewhere in between; because it's her that haunts me and it's her that won't let me go. She doesn't give up on me._

_And I am in love her for that._

_But I can't act on my feelings because I'm afraid if I do, I will hurt her. I know how strong she is physically. But emotionally I know deep down that she's as fragile as a dove._

_And I just can't risk that._

_I never can._

_So I wait and watch here in painful silence, unresponsive to her little affections and loving behavior. In fear of what can be between us. _

_I see what she desires from me, I want so much to fulfill them and do everything I see couples do on TV. I would take her dancing in the rain, hold her hand and go for long walks on the beach, all of that corny romance crud just to get a smile or giggle out her. To make her fall even more in love with me. _

_But I can't, because loving me is more dangerous than facing off a million Amazos or Mister Twisters. _

_I want to be the boyfriend she needs, the boyfriend she wants so badly it hurts._

_And it slowly kills me everyday when I can't be._

_But I do keep the flame, the small flicker of hope burning bright inside of her, alive by doing the little things. I smile at her when she does something that makes her happy, or when she learns something new about Earth. I compliment her whenever we're alone, even when she does something wrong I encourage her to try again or learn from her mistake._

_It eases the pain, though it feels like a knife is there cutting into my skin. Sinking deeper and deeper into my heart until the day I can gather up all the courage and strength to grasp the handle and pull it out._

_ I never knew I could feel something so strongly as this. I didn't even know I can _feel _this petty emotion at all. It's so unlike me... Or maybe it's just another side of myself that I had yet to discover, a side that M'gann only brings out in me. I__t hurts so much._

_Hopefully one day I can make the hurt stop._

_For the both of us._

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**A/N: Not good, probably ooc and just a bunch of run on and choppy sentences. Gah, writing for SB's so fricking difficult! But I've tried my best and I hope you guys respect my efforts.**

**So please leave advice or a comment in a review.  
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